"Ignorance or Plan? Special or Unaware? Preparation or Assumption?" by Rich Dweck

       Many people that have been through being gay, closeted and orthodox. Many people have just left the community and moved on. Others have stayed in the community, have married or just tried to have a foot in both worlds. To many young people going through this and thinking they are the "only ones". In the 1980's, the community lost members to the "Aids Crisis". If anyone asked, they would say they had cancer or something to cover it up. What's the point here? The point that needs to be made, people need to be aware.

        We have families that left the community and started anew because of many other issues. For some, they felt that they could no longer raise their children in a society that was so dishonest. If people had no issues, they were comfortable. If people had any issue, such as divorce, autistic child, homosexual in the family, pregnancy out of wedlock, abuse issues, bullying in schools and of course people that did not want their children growing up in a world that ignores the world around them. To many, people are happy within this cocoon. What about the others that are unhappy?

        Most of the community only prepared people for living inside the community. What happens if you can't stay? What happens if your path is different? What happens if you marry someone from another community and move there? What happens if you are gay? What happens if it is no longer healthy for you to be in the community? What happens if your child tell you they are gay?

        The Jewish Community should help prepare it's children for the world, not just the their world. Do we teach safe sex in schools? Do we teach what contraception is? Do we make university important? Do we just teach our children how to go in the family business. Are we preparing them for the world? What if they end up in another industry, company or state? Are we preparing our children for life? Do we teach them about drugs? Do we teach them to accept and embrace who they are? Do we push them to find their passion? Do we care if they are happy?

       Some might say "who needs that", "If it's not ours, then why should we care", "If we open ourselves up, then it will ruin what we have", "All they need to do is learn torah and they will be fine", "We are not Americans, we are special", "We don't want them subject to the world out there".

       Have you ever thought about these problems, concerns and questions?

Thank you,

Rich Dweck